Interview with Mitch Hasslet from JUNGLE OF DECEIT

Maureen: “I’m sitting here in Guatemala, in the heart of the Petén jungle with Mitchell Hasslet from the New York Chronicle. What brings you down here, Mr. Hasslet?”

Mitch: “After 250 pages we’re not on a first name basis yet?”

Maureen: “Right. I was trying to pretend this was formal.”

Mitch: “I have mosquitoes rearing generations of offspring on my arms and I think my backside has melted into this plastic chair. Plus, you have already seen me in some rather indelicate situations, so we seem to have passed formal long ago.”

Maureen: “Right. Okay then. Let’s talk about what brings you to the jungle.”

Mitch: “Money.”

Maureen: “No mincing of words there. What about the professor over there? Alex. What do you think about her?”

Mitch: “You mean Alexandra? Excuse me, Doctor Alexandra Langley. Yeah, she’s pretty hot. But I want to do my job and get the out of this godforsaken snake pit.”

Maureen: “So you think Alex is hot? What about me?”

Mitch: “Oh God! Ewww. You wrote me. Wouldn’t that be like incest or something?”

Maureen: “Well, yeah, but for the record, Alex isn’t that hot.”

Mitch: “Ummm, yeah. Yeah she is. But hey, like I said, I don’t have time for her.”

Maureen: “Right. You have to rush back to New York, to your kushy job taking pictures of Paris Hilton teaching her Chihuahua how to walk in high heels.”

Mitch: “Ouch. That’s not fair and you know it. I used to work in some of the most volatile locations in the world, and I’ve met with some of the most influential figures in politics…”

Maureen: Sigh. “And you’ve photographed wars...”

Mitch: “I have! You’re mocking me.”

Maureen: “You prefer Alexandra to me.”

Mitch: “You stuck me in the jungle with her. Oh, and by the way, isn’t that a boa constrictor hanging behind you?”

Maureen: “That trick will not work. This interview is about you. Now tell us, do you really think you’re going to find the stolen Mayan shipment down here?”

Mitch: “Honestly, I probably have about a 10% chance of finding it. But hey, they paid my way down here and I will get a huge bonus if I do…so if my incentive has anything to do with it, yeah I’ll find the damn artifacts.”

Maureen: “Good to know your morals are intact.”

Mitch: “Perhaps the hero in your next book will find you hot and you won’t harass me like this.”

Maureen: “It’s fortunate for you that JUNGLE OF DECEIT has been released. I could easily edit in a scene with you doing the backstroke in quicksand.”

Mitch: “You’d miss me.”

Maureen: “Would not.”

Mitch: “Umm, considering that boa is about to wrap around your neck, I’m guessing you might want to end this interview.”





Comments

  1. "Oh God! Ewww. You wrote me. Wouldn’t that be like incest or something?”

    ROFL :)

    Excellent. Thanks for the chuckle.

    ReplyDelete
  2. *Bursts out laughing*

    OMG - SO funny!

    Er...you know...except for that whole boa thing. Snakes are serious business after all.

    Mitch sounds like a real handful. I can't WAIT to spend some alone time with him.

    *blinks*

    That sounded much less dirty in my head.

    Hrm.

    ReplyDelete
  3. So, this is how you spend your days rather than working up something new for your readers. ;)

    Loved this entry, made me giggle. Mitch is adorably aggravating, isn't he?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello pretty Amanda,

    Good to see you here! :) Don't worry. I'm writing. Life keeps getting in the way, but I'm writing!

    ReplyDelete

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